


Holding Onto You (HIATUS)

by definitelymaybenot



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: And I guess Levi is Gerard Way, Because I love TØP, But has his own problems, College, Eren's mom is still alive, F/F, F/M, Furlan has Josh Dun's red warpaint, Furlan is Tyler Joseph & Isabel is Josh Dun, Furlan is pretty fuckin' cool, Isabel has Tyler Joseph's black blurryface paint, Levi & Eren have problems, M/M, Mikasa develops a crush on Furlan, One of Hange's ships will sink, Past Furlan Church/Nifa, With hair like that I understand why, all these damn brats are in college
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-08 00:09:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7735243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/definitelymaybenot/pseuds/definitelymaybenot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"There's an infestation in my mind's imagination"</p><p>He says</p><p>"I, I'll never be, be what you see inside"</p><p>I know</p><p>"You say I'm not alone, but I am petrified"</p><p>Don't be</p><p>"I must'a forgot, you can't trust me"</p><p>I do... So please</p><p>"And now that I write and think about it"</p><p>Don't think</p><p>"And the story unfolds"</p><p>But it's not over</p><p>"You should take my life"</p><p>Please...</p><p>"You should take my soul"</p><p>...Stop</p><p>"And I'll be holding on to you"</p><p>But I can't... So let go</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Last Goodbye

He stands on stage, like an god, red makeup around his eyes, his best friend and adopted sister on the drums, sweating.

"Last song, tonight." He says.

She bangs rapidly on the drums.

He wears a kimono while playing a Ukulele.

"When the leader of the bad guys sang, Something soft and soaked in pain, I heard the echo from his secret hideaway, He must've forgot to close his door, As he cranked out those dismal chords, And his four walls declared him insane."

He's singing his heart out, so upbeat, only he and the ones who actually listen and think, know this is not upbeat.

"I found my way,  right time, wrong place, As I pled my case.  
You're the judge, oh no, set me free, You're the judge, oh no, set me free, I know my soul's freezing, Hell's hot for good reason, so please, take me."

He's so good at hiding what he really feels inside, a bottomless pit of sorrow and despair.

"Three lights are lit but the fourth one's out, I can tell 'cause it's a bit darker than the last night's bout, I forgot about the drought of light bulbs in this house, So I head out, down a route I think is heading south,  
But I'm not good with directions and I hide behind my mouth, I'm a pro at imperfections and I'm best friends with my doubt, And now that my mind's out, and now I hear it clear and loud, I'm thinking, "Wow, I probably shoulda stayed inside my house."

And here he goes again.

"I found my way, Right time, wrong place, As I pled my case.  
You're the judge, oh no, set me free, You're the judge, oh no, set me free, I know my soul's freezing, Hell's hot for good reason, so please"

His plea for help is heart wrenching, it's unbelievable heart wrenching when the people don't listen and don't understand, don't know that this man wanted help, but just got confusion from them.

"I don't know if this song is a surrender or a revel, I don't know if this one is about me or the devil.  
I don't know if this song is a surrender or a revel, I don't know if this one is about me or the devil."

So, so confused.

"You're the judge, oh no, set me free, oh no You're the judge, oh no, set me free, oh no I know my soul's freezing, Hell's hot for good reason, so please,  
Na na na na, oh oh Na na na na, oh oh Na na na na, oh oh Na na na na, oh oh (You're the judge, oh no, set me free) Na na na na, oh oh (You're the judge, oh no, set me free) Na na na na, oh oh (You're the judge, oh no, set me free) (You're the judge, oh no, set me free)"

It's over.

"Thanks, have a good time, all of you, all the pretty faces, see 'ya"  
"Don't go, don't go is what I want to say, but I can't, I can't forgive myself, so goodbye Furlan.", Nifa says as she leaves the club.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is confused, Nifa breaks up with Furlan at his show, more about that later though.


	2. My Name's Blurryface...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren goes to a bar, heartbroken.
> 
> Then he runs into... "Blurryface"

EREN POV

It ended.

We started dating about five months ago, I was from Seattle, I was able to move to Vancouver in Canada after going through a legal process.

I enrolled and attend the University Of British Columbia, it was completely different than America, and that's a good thing.

I first saw him when I was working at Tim Hortons, he was rude, and he only came with his friends, he didn't drink coffee as he preferred tea, black tea to be exact.

I was invited to a party, and there he was, he looked annoyed, so I walked over and talked with him, he didn't talk much and would either give me a death glare or make an 'tch' sound with his teeth.

He opened and began talking more to me, after the party, we still stayed in touch, we exchanged numbers, these days were the best, one day I finally asked him out, and he said yes.

He took me everywhere, bought me anything I want, took my innocence, held my hand and showed me off like an trophy, let Canada and the entire world know that I was his, then he became more distant and more cold towards, yelled at me for no reason, accused me of cheating, avoided and ignored me, he no longer showed me off anymore, barely came home at nights.

I was walking to our room, at his house, I just got done with class and was tired out, I noticed someone's car parked, I didn't mind and walked on in, it was quiet at first, like usual, then I heard a creak upstairs, getting harder and harder, I walked up the stairs and heard someone's moans, each step I took, the moaning became clear, I was near the door, behind it contained my cheating boyfriend and his lover.

It was hard to keep my tears behind my eyes, my heart quickened, I should have saw it coming, but I was too blind to see and too stupid to realize and accept.

One breath, in and out, I opened the door, the two sweaty bodies jumped up and quickly covered themselves, Levi & his "best friend" Erwin Smith, were naked and sweaty.

"Eren, nice to see you buddy", Erwin said that so casually, as if he wasn't naked and sweaty next to my boy- ex-boyfriend.

"Eren we need to talk", Levi spoke up, I fired back at him, "We don't need to talk about where I'm going to stay from now on", Levi looked at me with a annoyed face, "You were too cling- Eren I'm talking! Where are you going?!", Levi yelled, "You two may resume your daily activity, I'll come back later to pack my stuff", Levi looked at me with a guilty look, "Eren, I'm sorry", "Yeah I'm sorry for thinking you were the one", I calmly responded, "Eren... Come back, Eren please don't leave, EREN!", and I was gone.

Now, I'm at bar, taking shots.

In order to ease my pain and trying to figuring out if I should stay with Mikasa or Armin until' I can get a new place.

Then all the sudden a pretty looking man, a little taller than me, same height as horse-face, but with a really good and unique hairstyle, different with all those undercuts I see everyday, he had dark blonde hair, I look at his eyes and they were pale blue eyes, he didn't notice, good thing.

"What can I get 'ya?", the bartender asks, the man looks up, "Grey Goose, full bottle", the bartender nods and walks to get the bottle, but seriously? Vodka? The entire bottle? Oh well.

He opens the Grey Goose and drinks it like it's just water, almost as if it doesn't burn in his throat like an thousand suns, while he's distracted, I look at him, up and down, wearing a baggy Red Stripe tank top, wearing dark blue skinny jeans cut off at the knees, pink Nike hi-tops? Wolf skin that he wears as a wrist bracelet, wolf skin used as a pants belt, he is wearing a kimono, two snake bites & a left earring that is a floppy one.

I didn't notice it at the time but, he's already drunk two Grey Gooses and is starting on his third one, and he still looks sober.

"Bad day, huh?", I say just to start a conversation, "Just the same shit, different day, in this case night", he says.

"You sure like Grey Goose"

"It's good, prefer Cîroc, but this bar only has Grey Goose, but vodka is vodka"

"Not a big Vodka fan, but it tastes alright"

"I see"

I see, that's what Levi use to say.

"So, just to make this less... Uh... I don't know... Awkward... I guess, my name's Eren, Eren Yeager"

He downed his third bottle then clears his throat.

"My name's Blurryface"

I look over at him as he searching for his wallet to pay the bartender.

"It was nice talking to 'ya Eren"

"You too... Uh... Blurryface?"

I smile awkwardly at him, he just smiles back, doesn't smirk, smiles.

"My name's Furlan, Furlan Church, see 'ya mate"

He pays and walks towards the door, but I stop him.

"Hey! What's your number?"

He turns and looks at me, he looks back and pulls out a red pin sharpie, he writes neatly on the receipt.

He throws me the sharpie and hands me his left forarm, I get the hint and I write my number on his forearm, he grabs my hand and opens it, he lays the receipt in my palm and softly closes it, I couldn't stop my blush from spreading rapidly across my face, he smiles at it instead of smirking, he smiles.

"Like I said see 'ya later Eren"

Then he messes my hair up, he walks out and heads back to his place.

I look at his receipt that contained his number, I giggled when I saw under his number he left "Blurryface" instead of his own, this guy was something else.

I went back to Levi's place to gather all my things.

As I suspected, Levi was sitting on the couch waiting for me to get back so he can "explain" the situation, I don't listen, I just tune him out and hear what little of Furlan's voice I heard, I packed my stuff up, Levi was trying so hard to make me stay, I walk outside with my bag and was about to call Armin then I changed my mind.

"Eren! I didn't give you permission to leave me! Eren! Please stay! We can get over this and move on! EREN!"

I instead called Furlan, I called "Blurryface"


	3. Twenty One Pilots a.k.a. Furlan & Isabel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren listens to Twenty One Pilots a.k.a. his crush & Isabel.

EREN POV

After I can't hear Levi yell anymore I call Furlan, I really hope he does pick up, I don't feel like telling Mikasa anything or else she would be charged with a murder case, and Armin has a test tomorrow.

So I called him, his ringtone surprised me, I mean he's not British, he uses British slangs but he has a hint of a French accent, like I said, this guy is something... Special.

~ I'm on the white cliffs of Dover  
Thinking it over and over  
But if I jump its all over  
A cautionary tale for yo- ~

His ringtone stopped and he answers, he must not like Oasis if he's a Blur fan.

"Nice ringtone"

"Uh... Who's this?"

"It's me Eren"

"Oh, what's up mate?"

"Uh... My boyfrie-"

"You need a place to stay?"

"How did you know?"

"No one drinks a Jagerbomb alone at a bar unless you just had a break up, Jagerbombs are party drinks, people who drink it alone are trying to find happiness to escape from a terrible break up"

"Whoa, okay... Uh... but you don't mind if I crash at your place do you?"

"No mate I don't mind, it's "850 Pixis Street", a small house that's trashed up"

"Okay thanks"

"No problem mate"

Then he hangs up.

I can't help it but my face looks like someone threw red paint on it, I even giggle like an schoolgirl, for the stupidest reason.

"He called me mate", this fuckin' reason for giggling is pathetic.

When I finally reach his home I see three vehicles that caught my attention, a red & black Shelby Mustang, a white Dodge Durango, and a white Ferrari Testarossa, seems coo- wait! A white fuckin' Ferrari Testarossa, Holy Shit.

I can see a light through the window of seems to be a basement, I look in and see Furlan holding a Ukulele in front of a mic, there's a girl with red hair that's fixed into two pigtails, green eyes, wearing only a black sports bra, white cargo shorts, pink socks, right behind a drum set with a Macbook on a stand next to her, Furlan is still in his clothes from earlier, and both them are sweaty.

Then suddenly Furlan starts playing the Ukulele.

"There's miles of land in front of us  
And we're dying with every step we take  
We're dying with every breath we make  
And I'll fall in line

A stranger's back is all I see  
He's only a few feet in front of me  
And I'll look left and right sometimes  
But I'll fall in line

No one looks up anymore  
'Cause you might get a raindrop in your eye  
And Heaven forbid they see you cry  
As we fall in line

And about this time of every year  
The line will go to the ocean pier  
And walk right off into the sea  
And then we fall asleep"

More instruments start playing, the girl plays a drum machine before drumming herself.

Then Furlan sings again.

"And as we near the end of land  
And our ocean graves are just beyond the sand  
I ask myself the question  
Why I fall in line

Then out of the corner of my eye  
I see a spaceship in the sky  
And hear a voice inside my head:  
Follow me instead  
Follow me instead  
Follow me

Then the wages of war will start  
Inside my head with my counterpart  
And the emotionless marchers will chant the phrase:  
This line's the only way

And then I start down the sand  
My eyes are focused on the end of land  
But again the voice inside my head says,  
Follow me instead  
Follow me instead  
Follow me  
Follow me instead [x5]

Take me up, seal the door  
I don't want to march here anymore  
I realize that this line is dead  
So I'll follow You instead

So then You put me back in my place  
So I might start another day  
And once again I will be  
In a march to the sea"

Then they stopped, it was over, I just realized my jaw hanging open, I hope nothing flew into my mouth, disgusting.

The girl speaks up and talks to Furlan.

"Hey Far?"

"What is it Mag?"

"When is that boy you were talking about getting here?"

"I don't know, he probably lives far, I hope nothing bad happened to him"

Furlan barely knows me and that girl doesn't know who I am other than "Boy", but they are concerned over me, should I tell them I was too busy listening to them, no that would sound somewhat creepy, I should just knock on the door.

After knocking on it a few times, I hear someone behind it.

"Who is it?"

"A boy"

"Hold on", I hear her back away from the door before shouting to Furlan, "Far! That boy is here!"

"Well let 'em in before he gets shot or something you twat!"

"Oh go suck a John Thomas!"

Seriously, these guys do sound funny using British slangs, what makes it more funny is the fact they are not using the British accent.

The door swings open and the girl appears before me.

"Shit mate I'm sorry for making 'ya wait!"

"It's fine"

"Get the fuck out of his way 'ya square head"

"You're the square head here mate"

The girl moves out of the way and motions for me to enter, she has huge friendly grin on her face.

"Sorry for that mate"

Furlan comes up to me wearing a hospital gown that was cut off at the wrist to make it a shirt, he had blue dotted boxers on and pink socks.

"Hi! My name's Isabel... Magnolia, but you can talk me Mag"

"Uh, hi I'm Eren, Yeager"

"Like an Jagerbomb?!"

"Oi, you have classes in the morning so go to bed"

She looked at Furlan and rolled her eyes then looked back at me.

"Sorry Eren, I would talk more but Far over here is being a douche"

"You were the one who enrolled in the morning classes"

"Whatever Far, I talk more in the morning Jagerbomb, goodnight"

"And he's Eren not some alcoholic beverage"

"Love you too Far"

The girl, Isabel, hugs Furlan tight but he messes her hair up, she smiles and goes to her room.

"Nice kid"

"Not the brightest, but yeah a good kid"

"Why does she call Far?"

"Even though my name is spelled F U R L A N D, it's pronounced Far-Lan"

"Why is spelt like that then?"

"I don't know, why is your last name spelt Y E A G E R instead J the A with two dots above it G E R?"

"I don't know the answer to that either, and how did you know my last name was spelt like that?"

He just smiles, why doesn't he smirk like everyone else I dated, which has only been three, he smiles, then he shows me his arm.

"You spelt it under your number"

"Oh, yeah, right, I'm so stupid"

He walks over and messes up my hair.

"We don't have a guest bedroom and I'm not letting you sleep on the couch and I'm not sleeping on it either or the floor, so even though this comes off creepy, you can sleep with me"

Smiling, I feel a blush coming up, no point in hiding it.

"Yeah sure"

"Come on"

I climbed in bed with Furlan, his blanket was the entire artwork of The Beach Boys' 1966 masterpiece "Pet Sounds".

Furlan went to sleep but I was having trouble, when I did I had a dream of marrying Levi, I woke up after that and started to silently sob.

Furlan must heard me because he woke up next to me, he rolled half over and rubbed his eyes to wake him up.

"Hey what's up Eren?"

"I-I heard a d-dream that m-m-me and my ex got m-married, and it felt so real, b-but it wasn't"

"If you don't mind me asking, so in order to understand your situation, what happened?"

I pulled myself together, for Furlan and began to tell him what happened.

"I was coming home, like usual, I noticed a different car parked, but I didn't pay attention to it, I didn't have a feeling of suspicion, I walked in and it was quiet, then I heard a creak, I walked up stairs and heard moans, my heart dropped, I denied it at first, and then it finally hit me, then there he was, the worst part of it was he was cheating on me with his best friend"

Furlan hugged me, I leaned and hugged him too, but tightly, then he told me something.

"I know how you feel, I was cheated on too"

I looked up at him, he was staring out his window.

"Her name was Nifa, she had short dark hair, small, really pretty, had a dark sense of humor"

Levi had a dark sense of humor as well, but they were mostly shit jokes, like literal shit jokes.

"She started acting different, more distant, barely talked to me, she always looked like she just got done crying, then one day at a show me and Mag just got done playing, I hopelessly stood on stage and watched her leave, she said something but I couldn't hear, just a sweaty guy watching his girlfriend leave him, we got home and everything she had was gone, she left a note saying she cheated on me, she never could forgive herself, so she left"

Furlan threw his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes.

"So I moved on, it was the only thing I could do"

I looked at him and he looked at me, I gave him a smile, and he once again smiled back, this man was already filling my heart back up.

"Goodnight Eren"

"Goodnight Far"

He closed his eyes then after awhile he fell back asleep, I laid my head on his chest and wrapped my arms around him, and I soon afterwards fell asleep.


	4. Just Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren falls completely in love with Isabel's pancakes, oh and Furlan

EREN POV

"Hey, do you want breakfast?"

Isabel's face hovered over mine, and because of that I jumped and yelped.

"Jesus Christ Mag, give him a heart attack", Furlan was standing at the door wearing a grey tank top, black Nike shorts, pink socks, what's up with pink footwear with these guys, he had wolf fur resting on his shoulders, the sun light made his snake bites shine, but he wasn't wearing his floppy earring, but he still had that sexy hairstyle.

"Okay, I'll need a redbull, two monsters, one Grey Goose, one Cîroc & a Jagermeister", Isabel responded, as Furlan was replying I noticed something extremely odd, like extremely 'ODD'

"Isabel, no one's going to drink a 'Nuclear Jagerbomb', that COULD kill someone", does Furlan notice that Isabel isn't wearing a bra and her breasts are on MY chest, she has her pigtails and black underwear with... Seriously, pink socks.

"Um, Isabel", I said in a whispered voice.

"What it is?", she responded with a deadpan voice with one eyebrow raised up.

"You're not a wearing a bra and your tits are on my chest", I heard Furlan coughing, trying to cover up his laughter, Isabel starts laughing too, and I just awkwardly grin.

"Get use to Jagerbomb, I sleep naked", what? And this doesn't disturb Furlan.

"Alright Mag, obviously Eren doesn't find your tits attractive, especially with your..."

Don't say anything Furla-

"Nipple piercings"

And instinctively I look up and see them, shining from the sun light.

"Now that you mentioned that Furlan, he sprung up... Maybe something else sprun-"

"Do you want breakfast Eren?", Furlan cuts off before I could die of embarrassment.

"Uh... Y-yeah sure", I say that so awkwardly.

"I'm making pancakes and Furlan has the toast and bacon all ready", Isabel says that while she gets off the bed and heads out but not before placing a floppy earring in his left ear.

Furlan smiles at her before messing her hair up, he turns and looks at me, still smiling, "Don't worry Eren she doesn't mind, if it makes you feel better I've seen worse, 'ya know, everything", Furlan says with a fake tremble, "Now come on, Isabel's pancakes are the best", I look at him with an smirk, "My mom has the-"

"Second best pancakes ever," I say that while fireworks explode in my mouth, while Furlan and Isabel headbang to the epic opening of "Just Awake" by Fear, and Loathing In Las Vegas, the pancakes and Furlan's homemade syrup taste good, I just noticed that sounded sexual, his 'homemade syrup' probably does taste good though.

"Hey! Eren, you attend UBC, right?", Isabel asked me, I just nodded too busy eating her extremely unbelievably good pancakes.

"What classes do you take?", I took a drink of chocolate milk and responded.

"I... Uh... Registered for Visual Arts, what 'bout 'ya?", great, just a day and I'm already talking like 'em, fuck!

"Audio Engineering, Analog Audio Recording", no surprise, she and Furlan have their own band, Twenty One Pilots, according to Isabel they had two others, their childhood friend and his girlfriend, but internal conflicts caused them to split and leave the band, apparently Furlan got the name from a play about how a man is responsible for the deaths of 21 pilots, speaking of Furlan.

"What 'bou- about you Furlan?", he looks up from eating his cereal, "Creative Writing", he says.

"Now classes are out of the way, do you have a job Eren?", she asked seemingly excited, literally bouncing in her chair.

"I work at... Tim Hortons", they both stopped what they were doing and looked at me with their jaws dropped, I began to get nervous.

"Shut the fuck up", they both said in unison, "Isabel show 'em", Furlan told Isabel, she got up and walked to the counter, she opened two cabinets, and inside the two cabinets was a shitload of Tim Hortons doughnuts, "You don't mind giving us a discount do 'ya Eren?", Furlan asked, I look at him and smile, "Sure", they both look at me again and in unison, "Really?", I just smile and laugh, "I gotta pay 'ya back some how", Furlan smiled and continued eating his cereal while Isabel give me a warm tight hug.

"How 'about you Isabel? Where do you work at?", she looked and proudly said, "7-Eleven", Furlan and Isabel said in unison, "The best damn bitchin' convenience store in all of Canada", they laughed with each other, I soon joined, I've never laughed and smiled this much in a long time, and I barely knew 'em, I'm glad I went to the bar that night instead of Armin's.

"How 'about 'ya mate?", I asked Furlan, he just got uncomfortable and mumbled something, "What?! Me and Eren couldn't hear 'ya mate?", he looked up and said, "... Baskin' Robbins...", I looked at him and grinned, he just smiled back then his smile faded when he realized.

"It's 8:26, you're late for class Isabel", she got up and finished dressing, then that's when I realized, "I'm late for work!"

I was walking with Isabel, we were going to her friend's place, a girl named Hange, she would ask her for a ride to campus, Furlan said he'll be at Tim Hortons getting coffee and doughnuts.

When we were walking and talking about different stuff, I found out that Furlan & Isabel are actual Canadians, Furlan is originally from Quebec and Isabel is originally from Windsor, they moved to Vancouver when they were adopted by a man named Kenny, she talked a little bit about their band, she talked about her and Furlan's obsession with the UK, her and Furlan's second favorite music scene is Britpop and their favorite music scene is Madchester, she told me something I suspected, Blur is Furlan's second favorite band, his favorite is The Stone Roses, how he only likes Oasis' first two albums, their Blur vs Oasis arguments, but they both liked Pulp and that settled their arguments, we were laughing and having a good time.

Isabel saw Hange having an argument with... Erwin.

"Um, Isabel", Isabel who looked worried for her friend, turned and looked at me, "What is it Eren?", I looked at her, she looked even more worried for me when she noticed tears threatening to spill out.

"Er-Erwin, slept with m-m-my boyf- ex-boyfrien-"

"Hey, Eren! I'd like to talk to you", Erwin hollered over at me, "Look, I'm sorry, that was very not cool for what happened, let's all three just talk abo-"

Next thing I knew, Erwin laid on the ground, knocked out, Isabel punched Erwin so hard she busted his lip and blood flew everywhere.

Isabel ran over to Hange and hugged her tightly, "I'll care of this Eren, head to work", I nodded and she did too.

"S-sh-she knocked h-h-him with one punch? ONE PUUUUNNNNNCCCCHHHH!", Furlan did the One Punch Man yell while laughing his ass off, I was sitting there in my uniform while he in his Baskin Robbins uniform wearing a navy blue Parka Jacket.

"Yeah it was pretty sweet", I laughed.

"Well shit, I would stay longer mate, but I gotta head to work", he said disappointedly, I frowned as well, "Well I should get back to work, see 'ya later"

I got up and he did as well, he just stood and looked at me, I was just about to say something but he said.

"Your eyes look gorgeous in the sun light", I just looked at him and blushed, he held my cheek and looked at me, smiling.

Then he kissed me.

And after realizing what he was doing, I kissed him back, he licked my bottom lip and I opened, his tongue explored everywhere, then we broke off for breath.

"Me and Isabel are playing show tonight, I'll pick you up and take 'ya there, you can watch, I'll play an song for 'ya"

"That sounds great, I get off at 5", I told him, "I get off at 4:30"

"You can come get me then", I said with a blush, he kissed me again.

"Hey, Eren, remember, I'll love you forever if you want", I blushed even harder than before and then, my heart beated for Furlan.

"I'll hold on to that thought babe", I told him, just then he looked at me and smiled while the sun light shined onto his face.

"And I'll be holding on to you", he told me, me.

"I have to get to work, I'll see 'ya after work", he kissed my cheek and smiled one more time, "I love you", then he walked out.

"I love you too", I said and went back behind the counter before I get caught.

"I'll be holding on to you", is all I hear in my head.

I am in love with Furlan, Furlan Church, I'm Furlan's and no one else's.


	5. Da Art Of Storytellin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren watches Twenty One Pilots peform for the second time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for some smut, 'cause it's gonna get HOT!

FURLAN POV

And here I am, standing on a stage again, it's our first show since the Nifa incident, but I have Eren now, so I'm good, everything is alright, ten songs, two covers, the last song is for Eren, I promised him.

I've been listening to a lot of Rap lately, mostly OutKast, De La Soul, A Tribe Called Quest, Wu-Tang Clan, Nas, Kendrick Lamar, I actually enjoyed it, me and Mag discussed about adding some rapping into our sound, I mean we're all over the place with our sound, might as well see if I can rap, I chose to do "Da Art Of Storytellin' Pt. 1" by OutKast, everything about that song is perfect, sometimes I wish I wrote that song, that song is perfect.

The last one is a secret.

Now I sit here letting Mag add my warpaint around my eyes, she already applied her makeup on, all around her neck and arms.

Once she's done I grabbed my kimono and put in mine & Kenny's lucky floppy earring, alright here I go.

EREN POV

Sold out show, and these guys aren't signed yet, then again this is Furlan and Isabel's first show since, as Furlan calls it, "The Bite Of '87".

Here they come, Isabel sits behind her drumset, she has black paint around her neck and arms, why? Then there's- oh my GOD! Furlan comes out wearing his signature style, what I mean is a kimono and then there's the red makeup around his eyes which makes him look even more sexier, and he's wearing those fuckin' pink Nike shoes.

"First time in an long time eh?", Furlan says into the mic, and everyone agrees, people yelling at the top of their lungs "YES!", wolf whistles... Girls... Ugh.

Isabel plays the backing tracks and the show starts.

The music seems weird and atmospheric, it's kinda slow and for Isabel, her drumming is slow, then Furlan does something that surprised me and everyone else, he starts rapping, then everyone starts whistling after they realize what they are playing, Furlan is rapping, these guys are all over the place.

"Somebody hit me the other day, for a rendezvous  
Was it the bitch that fucked the Goodie, and the Dungeon Crew  
Let's say her name was Suzy Skrew, cause she SCREWED a lot  
Makin a nigga hit that chonk, at legitimate spots  
Not no parks, backseats, or things of that nature  
Had to hate ya playa, I'm dickin the hoe down never said I paid her  
Straight laid her, slayed the bitch like Darth Daver, made her  
From College Park and Fayette, all the way down to Decatur  
Like Jada, her wig was sharp and sporty, that was shorty  
Safe as a snake on eggs in a Beamer eight-hundred-forty  
It's foggy, I went to the crib to call her but she lost me  
My baby mamma beeped seven o'clock it's gonna cost me  
but I still wanna cut her though, maybe she had to work  
I caught her in the mall, wearin a real tight skirt  
She was, fine as FUCK, I wanted to sex the hoe up  
She said, "Let's hit the parking lot so I can sick your duck"  
I said, "Cool, I really wanted to cut you but this'll do.  
I gotta pick up my daughter plus my baby mamma beeped me too."  
She said she understood then everything was kosher  
I gave her a Lil' Will CD, and a fuckin poster  
It's like that now

It's like that now, you better go on  
and get, the hump, up out your back now  
It's about four, or five, cats  
off in my 'Llac now  
We just, shoot, game in the  
form of story rap now (yeah)  
It's like that now, it's like that now"

Second verse and Furlan kills it.

"Now Suzy Skrew had a partna named Sasha (Sasha), Thumper (Thumper)  
I remember her number like the summer  
when her and Suzy yeah they threw a slumber - - party  
but you can not call it that cause it was slummer  
Well it was more like spend the night  
Three in the morning yawnin dancin under street lights  
We chillin like a villain and a nigga feelin right  
in the middle of the ghetto on the curb, but in spite  
all of the bullshit we on our back starin at the stars above  
(aww man) Talkin bout what we gonna be when we grow up  
I said what you wanna be, she said, "Alive" (hmm)  
It made me think for a minute, then looked in her eyes  
I coulda died, time went on, I got grown  
Rhyme got strong, mind got blown, I came back home  
to find lil Sasha was gone  
Her mamma said she with a nigga that be treatin her wrong  
I kept on singin my song and hopin at a show  
that I would one day see her standin in the front row  
But two weeks later she got found in the back of a school  
With a needle in her arm, baby two months due, Sasha Thumper

It's like that now, you better go on  
and get, the hump, up out your back now  
It's about four, or five, cats  
off in my 'Llac now  
We just, shoot, game in the  
form of story rap now (yeah)  
It's like that now, it's like that now"

One more time.

"It's like that now, you better go on  
and get, the hump, up out your back now  
It's about four, or five, cats  
off in my 'Llac now  
We just, shoot, game in the  
form of story rap now (yeah)  
It's like that now, it's like that now"

And everyone cheers, claps & of course... Whistles, I felt like the only one doing a fangirl scream, who cares? My boyfriend looked awkward doing it but he didn't sound awkward, he sounded confident, not physically but mentally.

He starts speaking, saying, "This is a new song, it's not done yet but I hope 'ya like.", oh Furlan, everyone will love it.

Isabel plays a new backing track while Furlan pulls out a Ukulele and the crowd goes crazy.

He plays a few notes and starts singing.

"She asked me, "Son, when I grow old,  
Will you buy me a house of gold?  
And when your father turns to stone,  
Will you take care of me?"

She asked me, "Son, when I grow old,  
Will you buy me a house of gold?  
And when your father turns to stone,  
Will you take care of me?"

I will make you queen of everything you see,  
I'll put you on the map,  
I'll cure you of disease.

Let's say we up and left this town,  
And turned our future upside down.  
We'll make pretend that you and me,  
Lived ever after happily.

She asked me, "Son, when I grow old,  
Will you buy me a house of gold?  
And when your father turns to stone,  
Will you take care of me?"

I will make you queen of everything you see,  
I'll put you on the map,  
I'll cure you of disease."

Even more people began cheering, loudly.

"It's not finished, but I don't give a shit", he says making the crowd cheer again.

Seven songs later and the crowd is just as sweaty as Furlan & Isabel.

Furlan walks to the mic after drinking water then Cîroc, and announced the last song.

"This last song is for someone special in my life, this song is called "Waste".

This song is for me, as usual, Isabel plays the backing tracks and starts drumming, this is my song I think as Furlan starts singing.

"I'll hold your hand when you are feeling mad at me  
Yeah when the monsters they won't go and  
your windows won't close  
I'll pretend to see what you see

"How long?" I say, how long will you relive the things that are gone?  
Oh yeah, The devil's on your back but I know you can shake him off

And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can  
And every day that you want to wake up, and you want to wake, you can  
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah  
I'll help you see it through 'cause I just really want to be with you

You know it's funny how freedom can make us feel contained  
Yeah When the muscles in our legs aren't used to all the walking  
I know if you could snap both your fingers that you'd escape with me  
But in the meantime, I'll just wait here and listen to you when you speak... or scream

And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can  
And every day that you want to wake up, and you want to wake, you can  
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah  
I'll help you see it through 'cause I just really want to be with you

The truth cuts us and pulls us back up  
And separates the things that look the same  
You can fight it off, you can fight it off, you can

And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can  
And every day that you want to wake up, and you want to wake, you can  
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah  
I'll help you see it through 'cause I just really want to be with you"

When the song ends, I couldn't hold my tears back, Furlan is definitely the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, it was so beautiful.

I was brought back to reality when I heard Furlan speak.

"That was the last song for tonight everyone, it was good yeah?", and everyone claps and cheers while others are yelling, "YEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!"

Tonight, I gonna ride Furlan so hard tonight.

Isabel said she had to run to the store and buy some food to cook.

And here I am, just in my underwear as Furlan is taking off his pants while we were kissing each other like there was no tomorrow.

I heard Furlan moan inbetween kisses while I was stroking his hard cock, I gave him one last kiss before got on my knees and started bobbing my head in a steady rhythm.

"Fuckin' hell Eren", Furlan was trying to surpress his moans while I was giving him a blowjob.

Enough, I got up and pulled out some lube, I poured some on my hand then started stroking Furlan, he put one finger in my entrance and slowly went in and out, I let out a moan then a louder one when Furlan stuck a second finger in, we started kissing again but more roughly, I was moaning inbetween kisses then I let out a gasp as Furlan stuck a third finger in, he begun thrusting his fingers faster while I let out loud and uncontrollable moans, then I looked at him and said, "I'm ready".

I laid backwards as I spread my legs for him, he positioned his cock at my entrance, he looked at me and I looked at him, then he said, "Hey Eren, what's that?", he pointed at the ceiling, I looked up and didn't notice anything, "What's wha- AHHHHH!!!!"

Bastard, he stuck his cock in earning a surprised moan with me filled with pain but almostly pleasure.

He thrusted in me rapidly, in and out, skin slapping skin as I moaned and cursed, it felt so good.

"Oh! Furlan- Ah! D-don't sto- Ah! Fuck!", the bed began creaking as Furlan slammed into my ass furiously, I started stroking myself.

"Oh my g-god! Furlan! Don't stop! Don't fuckin'- AH! F-Furlan! I'm gonn- I'm gonna cum- FURLAN!", I shouted at the top of my lungs as I came all over my stomach, some landed on Furlan's chest, he was almost at his peak as well.

"Fuck, Eren fuckin' hell, I'm gonna cum", I tightened up as Furlan thrusted in me hard one last time before cumming inside me, I felt my body jerk in pleasure, Furlan carefully pulled out then kissed me after collapsing beside me, "I love 'ya Eren".

"I love you too Furlan", after that we both fell asleep.


	6. Can You Save My...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past will always be there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The past comes back to Farlan, Mentally, Emotionally, & Physically.

EREN POV

Furlan said he'd be working a little late so I had to find a ride home, luckily Isabel wasn't working so she would walk with me to our house, yes our house.

She wasn't here yet so I stood outside waiting for her while playing Marvel puzzle quest, then it all happened so suddenly, an all-to-familiar voice spoke up.

"Eren?"

"...L-Levi?"

 

FURLAN POV

I didn't have to work late, I just said that so I could go to the store and buy some 'stuff', some alone time, I don't want to seem clingy, I just wanted to give him some space.

Someone walked in, I guess I have to do my job.

"Welcome to fuckin' Baskin Robbins, what can I ge- oh... Hi Annie!", my favorite customer, Annie Leonhart, not gonna lie, I had a crush on her when she first came here, but now I'm with Eren, gonna push that schoolgirl crush away.

"Hey Church"

"Jamoca Almond Fudge and an...."

"Wild 'n Reckless Sherbet"

"Party tonight eh?"

She nodded her head, she never really spoke, she spoke when she needed to, just like big bro, Levi.

She was just as emotionless as him, but more colder, unless it was Reiner, Bertolt, Me, Mr. Leonhart and Mina.

"Sorry I couldn't go to your show, everyone was talking about on Facebook"

"Don't worry about it"

"So rapping huh?", and she smirked.

"It was more like Beck white-boy rapping if I was to be honest", I replied and she had a little smile.

"I'm glad you're moving on, I swear If I see that bitch-"

"Don't worry about Annie, what's done is done, to move on is to grow"

"Yeah your right, it's just you were so happy playing music, it sucked all your problems away, all those voices gone, and then that bitch took out the light behind your eyes-"

"Annie this isn't the time to make My Chemical Romance references"

"Damn", all I could do was laugh, Annie was always finding ways to make MCR references.

"But I'm serious Farlan, I'm glad you're doing music again"

"I know you are"

So I did my job and went to fix her orders.

I finished getting her usual Ice Cream and now I'm preparing her 'party cream' while she was getting her money, I'm feeling great today, so it's on me.

"Don't worry Annie, it's on me"

"R-Really?"

An emotion on Annie's face is not something you see everyday.

"Yeah, for free, at least for you", she took her orders and smiled, and then a jealous customer spoke up, worst mistake of his life.

"You shouldn't be that, make her pay or I'll report this incident to yo-", I feel bad for the bastard as Annie grabbed his shirt collar.

"If you don't shut up you are going to regret crossing my path in a few minutes, if I hear he got fired because of someone who couldn't keep their mouth shut then I will find you and beat the holy hell out of you, am I clear or do I have to teach you with pain?", Annie can be a fuckin' beast if you piss her off.

"Y-yes m-ma'am"

She let him go and he quickly went back to eating.

"See 'ya Church"

"See 'ya Leonhart"

And there she goes, god, I really need to let that crush go or else I'll be no better than that sack of shit that cheated on Eren.

And here comes those horny freshmen girls.

"Welcome to fuckin' Baskin Robbins what can I get 'ya you little shits?"

'Hamburger meat' check.

'Cheese' check.

'Hamburger buns' check.

'Blue Moon' check.

At the store buying stuff to make dinner with.

Now all I need is some Marshmallows & Stars, Chocolate milk, Milk, Coke, Coca-Cola, And...

"Oh, Hey Farlan!"

Everything stopped, sound no longer exists, despair sneaks in, blood stops pumping, the world slowly becomes dark, and oh god, the voices.... Here they come.

I slowly turn around and there she was.

Nifa.

"Hey Farlan, it's been a long time, eh?"

And there's that bastard Moblit Berner.

'Kill him'

'No regrets Farlan'

'This world doesn't care for you so kill him!'

'Don't be scared Farlan you worthless sack of shit'

'That's why Nifa cheated on you and left you, because your worthless sack of shit'

'No one cares'

'This world is cruel, you should know that'

"Farlan, are you okay? You're kinda scaring me"

'Show her what true fear is Farlan'

"I-I uh-uh-uh... I gonna go, it was nice seeing you too, have a nice life!"

Then I bolted out of there, leaving behind my groceries, I needed to run, everyone loooked at me as I was running towards the end, I need to get out of there, I needed to be somewhere I belong.

'Six feet under, rotting away as you play with you're new friends, the worms that will crawl through your rotting bones'

SSSSSSSTTTTTTTTOOOOOOPPPPPPPP!

SHUT UP!!!!

Bursting through the door and into my bedroom, I think I left my car at the store, but what do I know?

'Pain, Despair, Fear, Loneliness'

GO AWAY!

'End It Farlan'

'Leave this world and end your pain'

'Do it'

'No one can save you'

'Save your soul'

"SSSSSSSTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOPPPPPPP! AHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"ISABEL! ANNIE! BERT! REINER! EREN! EREN! EREN! EREN! CAN YOU SAVE MY HEAVY DIRTY SOUL!!!!"

'No one can'

"AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

'Farlan'

"SAVE MY HEAVY DIRTY SOUL FOR ME!"

'No one will, you're finished'

"FOOORRRRR MEEEEE!"

 

ISABEL POV

Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!

I forgot to pick up Eren, shit!

I almost home now.

Well Farlan's still at work since his car's gone, that's means, I can take the Testarossa, that bitch Nifa left it so Farlan took it, Farlan won't mind... The door's broken, our front door's broken.

I ran inside to expect a burglar not... Oh god.

I didn't expect to see Farlan curled up on the floor crying.

"Farlan?"

He didn't respond, all he did was repeat the words big bro told him once, over and over and over again.

"Gangsters don't cry, Therefore I'm, Mr. Misty-eye, therefore I'm...", over and over and over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone notices that it is spelled "Farlan" instead of "Furlan", my friend wrote this one, too lazy to come up with any ideas so I let my friend do it.


	7. Ode To Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren finds out about Farlan's past, and the voices he keeps imprisoned.

EREN POV

"What do you want Levi?", I said in a venomous tone.

"To talk, is that too much to ask?"

"Over the line"

"You don't have to be such a smartass, Eren"

"It's so cringing to hear my name come out your tongue"

"I just... I just want to make things right, I was... I don't know"

"Well tell me when you make a pathetic excuse for cheating on me, I have a man to get home to"

"Wait, a man?"

"Yeah, my man"

"Who is it?"

"None of your business"

"Never knew someone named their kid "None of your business" to be honest"

"Now look who's being a smartass, will I better get going my ride isn't coming", when I was walking away Levi came up and grabbed my wrist, stopping me.

"Eren please, let's just start over again, I'll earn your trust back, don't leave me please", I just let out a fake laugh, which shooks him... Good.

"Look who's begging? Is Jesus coming back or am I just dreaming, cause I swore I heard Levi "Fuckin' my best friend" Ackerman, beg, pathetic, now leave me be, I want to get home and cook for Furlan, since he's working late"

He looks at me with a confused face, then speaks up.

"Out of everyone in Vancouver, the person you chose to get revenge on me is Furlan Church?", he says Furlan's name with a laugh, which pisses me off but it pushes me over the edge that he thinks I'm using him.

"Me and Furlan are actually dating and I am in love with him, so wipe that smile off your pale face you sack of shit"

After being silent for a couple of seconds Levi just starts bursting out laughing, the fuck is wrong with Levi?

"In love? With Furlan? Jesus Eren, Furlan's fuckin' crazy, that's why Nifa cheated on him"

I don't care about Nifa but he talked shit about my man, worst mistake of his life, so I picked Levi off the ground, grabbing his collar in a fist.

"How the hell do you know Furlan?"

He looks at me and smirks.

"I was his and Isabel's close childhood friend, I played bass in his and Isabel's stupid band"

I feel like snapping, but I kept my anger under control.

"Okay, now, why the hell did you call Furlan crazy? And what was wrong with him to make that bitch Nifa cheat on him then leave him?"

He laughs, I am about to snap his neck.

Then his reply shocked me.

"Furlan has schizophrenia, Nifa cheated on him and left him because he was crazy, he heard voices in his head, he was schizophrenic, he's a crazy bastard, that schizod man doesn't deserve you at all-"

He punched the shit out of Levi before pulling him back up then I kneed him in the face.

"Don't talk about Furlan like that, you sack of shit, now I'm glad I left your ass, forget about second chances Levi, because now I know you are a cold heartless bastard, abandoned your childhood friends because of one them had a mental disorder, that's low, so stay out of mine and Furlan's life, you lying cheating midget!"

He looks up at me while was wiping off the blood from his busted lip, eyes soften all the sudden.

"That wasn't cool of me to say that about Furlan, it's just I wanted you to come back to me so bad I needed an reason for you to end things with him, so I thought I could make you scared of him, I just... I just want you back!"

I was about to say something but my phone started ringing, it was Isabel, so I answered it because this call seemed more important than this conversation.

"What's up Izzy?"

"It's Furlan!", she yelled but not in a harsh way but more in a panic and scared way.

"What about Furlan?", I say with a very concerned voice.

"I think he's having a mental breakdown, I came home but I forgot about walking with you, so I was going to get the keys to the Testarossa, but I noticed the door was broken so I thought someone was robbing us but when I came in Furlan was lying on the floor, crying, I can't get him to calm down! So please get here quick!"

She hung up quickly and I sprinted, ignoring Levi's calls for me, Furlan was having a mental breakdown.

When I arrived Izzy pointed towards the door to our room.

I walked in and Furlan was crying his eyes, all he kept saying was, "Gangsters don't cry, therefore I'm, Mr. Misty Eye, therefore I'm", he said it over and over again.

I crawled in bed with him and held him tight, tears ran down my face because it was heart breaking listening to this nice and beautiful human creature, cry his eyes out, so I sang in his ear, I sang his favorite song of all time, "God Only Knows" by The Beach Boys.

"Hey, Furlan don't cry, shhhh, don't cry"

He stopped but was still sniffing, I cleared my throat and that made him flinch, I told him, "Sorry", and sang in his ear.

"I may not always love you  
But long as there are stars above you  
You never need to doubt it  
I'll make you so sure about it

God only knows what I'd be without you

If you should ever leave me  
Though life would still go on believe me  
The world could show nothing to me  
So what good would living do me

God only knows what I'd be without you

God only knows what I'd be without you

If you should ever leave me  
Well life would still go on believe me  
The world could show nothing to me  
So what good would living do me

God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows what I'd be without you  
God only knows  
God only knows what I'd be without you"

I sang until' he fell asleep.

He tossed and turned through the night, but I didn't mind, I soon fell asleep once he stopped.

FURLAN POV

It happened all at once, my dream... My nightmare, was terrifying, I would tell you what it was about but...

I woke up.

Isabel came in, like usual, bra-less and in underwear, she gave me a weak smile.

"What's wrong Furlan, you alright?"

I just nod and told her what the problem was.

"I... I swear I heard demons yellin', but I guess I was just in a lucid state"

She nod in understanding, so I asked her a question that if she'd answer, I would know everything about the universe, and it was...

"Are you making pancakes?"

She nod before quietly laughing, I know everything now.

"What are you doing up this early anyway Mag?"

She looked at me and laughed.

"I was watching a re-run of some spelling bee on ESPN, it was funny, those kids were so intense, he should have heard all those crazy words they were spellin', it was funny"

Then I heard a voice inside my head, it didn't sound like the others, it said...

'I swear I heard demons yelling  
Those crazy words they were spelling'

Isabel went back to making pancakes and I quickly grabbed my notebook and wrote down everything I was thinking of.

After I wrote some lines, I realized, I was writing a new song, I wrote down.

'Why am I not scared in the morning?  
I don't hear those voices calling,  
I must have kicked them out, I must have kicked them out,  
I swear I heard demons yelling,  
Those crazy words they were spelling,  
They told me I was gone, they told me I was gone'

I called it, "New Nightmare", but I changed to something different, I renamed it, "Ode To Sleep", and I began writing the song down.

Maybe some of the voices and nightmares weren't all bad.

"How 'ya doin' beautiful?"

I looked over at Eren, he had bad bed hair, I didn't mind, I just leaned back and we planted a kiss on each other's lips.

My life was doing better, all because of Eren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheesy reason for writing "Ode To Sleep"


	8. Heathens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looks like someone has a crush.

EREN POV

"Come on, I want you guys to meet him, he's really nice and loving.... Unlike someone I use to know"

"I guess me and Mikasa can see him"

I got happy and excited, my friends agreed to meet my new boyfriend.

"Where do you want to meet up at?", my little yellow coconut asked.

"How 'bout Tim Hortons?", I asked.

"Did you just pronounced about as 'bout?", I heard him laugh a little, damn Izzy and Far got me talkin' just like 'em, I mean talking just like them.

"Shut up"

"So Tim Hortons? Okay we'll be there", I was literally jumping up and down.

"Okay see 'ya, bye"

"Yeah, see YOU later.", that little yellow coconut hung up, I swear Armin can be a cunt at times.

MIKASA POV

A new boyfriend already? I guess Eren lied about saying he couldn't "imagine life without Levi", then again Levi's a cunt anyway.

His name was weird, Fur-Lan or Far-lan, Farlander or some shit like that, he better treat Eren right, which according to Eren, he is, though he said the same about Levi whenever their relationship was at the end.

This guy better not be short and a massive cunt, like Levi, I just want to rip that midget's eyes out and leave him dying somewhere in Vancouver Island or somewhere.

Me and Armin arrived at Tim Hortons, the one Eren works at.

"What do you think this one is gonna be like Mikasa?", everyone's favorite yellow coconut asked.

"I don't know, probably cocky, Eren always had a thing for some of the most cockiest men on the face of the Earth, like Reiner, Jean & Hank Hill's dad, Levi"

We heard the door opened and here came Eren with his boyfriend.

Me and Armin got up to meet them, I smiled at Eren and was about to glare at his new one, but instead I froze, because I saw the most attractive man I've ever seen.

Oh my god he's fuckin' hot!

ARMIN POV

We sat and ate doughnuts, drunk the best coffee ever, and Furlan was a pretty cool dude, he wasn't rude like how Levi was when we first met him.

He and his sister, that he simply called "Mag" while Eren called her "Izzy", but her real name was Isabel, those two were in a band, they recently started playing shows again after a incident that Furlan simply called, "The Bite Of '87", I guess he's an FNAF fan.

He had a small french accent, well he did say he came from Quebec.

While I sat my cup on the table, I saw Mikasa, staring at Furlan, she tried to hide it, she had her scarf covering her mouth, meaning she was hiding a blush, someone has a crush.

EREN POV

I was glad Mikasa was getting along with someone other than me and Armin, her and Furlan had a lot in common, both are Canadians, they both like sixties music, mostly The Beatles, they both hate Bubblegum pop, their favorite movie was "Donnie Darko", they both love "Berserk" and "Akira", I was glad they were getting along, then I caught Mikasa blushing at everything that she and Furlan had in common, Furlan saw her blush and just laughed, I was suddenly starting to feel jealous, I never really been a jealous person, but now, I'm gonna take Furlan home and give him the best head he ever had.

"Me and Furlan have to get home and cook, so we'll see you guys later, yeah?", damn those Brits, and damn Izzy and Far.

We said our goodbyes, Armin shook hands with Furlan, nothing, Furlan shook hands with Mikasa, jealousy rose.

After they were gone I asked Furlan a question.

"Can I meet your friends since you met mine?", we were in his Mustang and he looked at me then looked back at the road.

"Sure, but..."

"But what Far?"

"All my friends are Heathens", I looked at him confused, what the fuck is he talking about?

"And?", I asked.

"Heathens, not religious Heathens, but a term me and Mag made up, our definition of Heathens are, "Friends that are usually overprotective, and they do not trust relationship partners easily, depending on long the relationship lasts without any problems they will trust and eventually become friends with their friend's partner"

"Oh so, they're kinda like bodyguards of your heart?"

"Yeah, you could say that, they have to get use to you, depending on how long our relationship lasts they'll trust you and want to meet you, this happened after the "Bite Of '87", so right now, they have no interest in you"

"Okay, so we'll wait"

"Yeah, all my friends are Heathens so just... Like... Take it slow Eren, they'll would want to meet you soon.

FURLAN POV

'All my friends are heathens, take it slow'

Sounds great, nice ring to it, note to self, write a song with those words in it.


	9. The Run and Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TØP are offered a record deal with Reiss Records, the biggest and most successful record label, for this they celebrate and something bad happens to Furlan.

FURLAN POV

Rod Reiss offered us a record deal, we signed our contract, we are now signed to Reiss Records, we have two months to write songs before having to go and record our debut album, this is the GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE!

In celebration, we threw a party, it's the only right thing to do when you get news like this.

Me and Isabel already chose Uri Reiss as the producer, he's our favorite producer, the guy loves electronic instruments, although Isabel didn't want to, but she knew Uri Reiss preferred the drummers to record with electronic drumsets.

We had a lot of people at the party, I mean a shit load.

"Congrats Furlan!", hell even Annie came, but she still had that resting bitch face, that's what makes her sexy- Idiot! You're with Eren.

"Annie! Never knew you'd come, did Reiner & Bertolt bring you into this?"

"Well yes actually, but I wasn't at your first show after a year of being on hiatus, so to make it up to you I came here to celebrate, settled on a name yet?"

"Yeah, we have, we're naming it "Regional At Best", we already have nine songs written, I mean, I written"

"Arrogant Eh? Names?"

"Slowdown, Forest, Glowing Eyes, Kitchen Sink, Anathema, Lovely, Ruby, Be Concerned, & Clear"

"Seems legit"

"Annie really? Legit? They still say that?"

"I still say it, so fuck you"

"Annie being a little hostile"

"Furlan being a tight pussy"

"Words hurt Annie, they really do"

"Oh shut the fuck up"

"That was an interesting conversation"

"Yeah, well, anyway congratulations"

"You'll buy it Annie, or at least listen to it, won't you?"

"I'll probably be the first to buy it"

"Alright"

"Well I have to go find Bertolt and Reiner, nice talking to 'ya Church"

"And now you call me Church"

"Yeah, I did."

Annie waved at me and walked off, and I just went to go grab some fuckin' Cîroc, then I saw it.

"Connie! No!"

I was too late, Connie just drunk, a Nuclear Jagerbomb, he's gonna have a heart attack.

"I feel like I'm gonna have a heart attack Isabel"

"What the fuck Isabel? What part of could kill someone didn't you get? You okay Connie?"

"Yeah, I just have to breathe, calmly"

I patted his shoulder before taking Isabel's Nuclear Jagerbomb and pouring onto her head.

"What the fuck Far!"

After hours of listening to EDM and IDM, everyone is far out or passed out, drunk.

The party is still going but it's about to fade away.

Me and Isabel sat on the pouch looking at the stars, we were signed to the biggest record label ever, about to make our debut album, about to begin working with the best producer out there, but I know whenever something good happens, something bad is bound to happen.

Mostly everyone was gone, but me and Isabel noticed a certain car, a certain car that was too familiar, everyone was gone, except this one person, the last I saw of Eren he was down the hall and he closed the door to their bedroom during the night, drunk off his ass, all the pieces fit together whenever Isabel said four words.

"Is that Levi's car?"

I got up and ran towards the door, running down the hall to MY room, I smashed through it, I was so stupid to think I was getting over Nifa, now I have to get over Nifa 2.0

"F-Furlan?"

There the two were, Eren and Levi, fuckin' in my bed.

Levi suddenly looked guilty and Eren looked like he was about to cry, saying those words Nifa said when she left me.

"I'm sorry, so sorry."

I looked at Eren and Levi.

Then I nailed Levi right in the face, busting his lip, Eren tried to hug me but I threw him over my shoulder, his breath was taken away from landing hard on the ground.

I grabbed the keys to Testarossa and ran out.

I was driving down a highway, driving fast in a Ferrari Testarossa, mildy drunk.

4:37 in the morning, my "boyfriend" cheated on me, ironically, and someone stole my car radio, nothing to listen except me and the car engine.

"FUCK THIS WORLD!"

I stepped on the pedal and drove as fast as I can, avoiding hitting other cars, going fast, too fast.

Now I just sit in silence.

'And I'll fall down  
And I'll break down  
And I'll fake you out'

'I know what you think in the morning  
When the sun shines on the ground  
And shows what you have done  
It shows where your mind has gone'

'Am I the only one I know  
Waging my wars behind my face and above my throat  
Shadows will scream that I'm alone'

'You are surrounding all my surroundings  
Sounding down the mountain range  
Of my left-side brain  
You are surrounding all my surroundings  
Twisting the kaleidoscope  
Behind both of my eyes'

'I have these thoughts  
So often I ought  
To replace that slot  
With what I once bought  
'Cause somebody stole  
My car radio  
And now I just sit in silence'

'And I'll be holding on to you'

"FURLAN!"

My mind comes back to reality.

Then I see Nifa standing in the middle of the highway, and I was rapidly heading towards her.

I stepped on the brakes and jerked the steering wheel to the left, causing the car to flip over.

And I just kept flipping and flipping, I felt mu arm break, my ribs crushed, my ankle felt like it was sprained, a broken glass window jabbed into my stomach, getting deep.

The Testarossa kept flipping and flipping before finally stopping.

Upside down, I unfastened the seat belt falling onto the roof, causing the glass to cut deeper into my stomach, piercing through the muscle.

I climbed out of the car, slowly, I looked up and saw Nifa wasn't there at all, I was too distracted with my inner thoughts, damn the fucker who stole my car radio, Eren has Levi back now, I was so stupid to think he actually loved me.

I should have known I was a toy to him, wanting to make Levi jealous, he succeeded and I guess they got back together, or Eren left me to someone who's actually sane, not schizophrenic, like me, Eren deserves someone who's not fucked up in the head, Levi was always better than me, I was always in his shadow, this is why I can't trust anyone, they always leave, Kenny never left me, he left me when it was his time to go, and I couldn't stop it and he knew he couldn't stop it.

I will never trust again, never.

I can hear the ambulance and police sirens off in the distance, but I can't see, I can see only dark, but then there is a light that never goes out, let me go.

'And now that I write and think about it  
And the story unfolds  
You should take my life  
You should take my soul'


	10. New Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren explains his actions, reveals an evil plan, Furlan is no longer Furlan, he is traumatized by his dreams, his nightmares.

EREN POV

"Listen here Eren! If you don't have sex with Levi, I'll poison Furlan's medication"

"What the fuck is wrong with you Erwin!"

"You've been avoiding Levi, you erased him, I tried to get you two back together, you're hurting Levi! He's so depressed! All he thinks about is you!"

"He hurt me more, he cheated on me! With you! I moved on and so he can too!"

"Then I'll poison the son of a bitch! Don't think I will? Just watch!", this psychotic motherfucker picks up all of Furlan's medication and is about to poison them, I'm gonna fuckin' hate myself forever, but this bitch got his way, he's way stronger than me so fighting him is useless.

"Fine! I'll do it!"

Forgive me Furlan, if you catch me, please understand I'm doing this to save your life, there's no other way, I'm sorry, I'm not strong enough to fight Erwin, god forgive me and take this bastard known as Erwin Smith to hell.

Then... All I remember is being kiss roughly, blowing Levi, crying while Levi thrusts into me, then... You.

I catch a breath and put some clothes on, Furlan caught me, and he just drove off in the Testarossa, fuckin' Erwin.

I feel the tears run down my face, I promised to never hurt you, to love you forever, Erwin this is his fault, it's also my fault because I'm not strong.

I swallowed down a sob, tears pouring out of my eyes, then Levi tries to hug me but I shove him off.

"GET THE FUCK OUT!", I yelled at Levi, he looks shocked and saddened, but I couldn't give a shit, I hurted Furlan, the man I promised to love forever.

Levi puts on his clothes and is out.

I lay on the bed and cry my eyes out.

Isabel was furious at me, lashed out, then I told her, I guess she believed me as she started to rub my back.

Then she got a call.

"Hello? Yeah... Oh my god!", she hung up quickly and looked at me, tears threatening to pour out of her eyes.

"Get dressed and get into the Mustang!"

"Why? What's wrong?"

She turned and looked at me in tears, then she said one word that made my heart drop.

"F-Furlan"

FURLAN POV

"Mr. Church, can you hear us? He's moving his head! But he looks like he isn't gonna make it, take him to into surgery, make sure to stop the bleeding from his abdomen, and find any broken or sprained bones!"

"Yes doctor!"

"Come on Mr. Church stay wit-"

So this is hell, a dark place, the only light shines upon me, lighting me up.

Then I'm grabbed by multiple skeleton hands, they hang onto me, dragging me down with them, I fight, I tried.

"STOP!"

"LET ME GO!"

"STOP! AHHHHHH! STOPPPP!"

They can't dragging me under, no escape, but I can't give up, but what awaits for me, should I go on with that pain that lays inside my heart, or just give up.

The voices come, inaudible, then I focus on what they're saying.

'I wake up fine and dandy but then by the time I find it handy,  
To rip my heart apart and start planning my crash landing,  
I go up, up, up, up, up to the ceiling,  
Then I feel my soul start leaving, like an old man's hair receding,  
I'm pleading please, oh please on my knees repeatedly asking,  
Why it's got to be like this. Is this living free?  
I don't want to be the one, be the one who has the sun's blood on my hands,  
I'll tell the moon, take this weapon forged in darkness,  
Some see a pen, I see a harpoon.'

'I'm taking over my body  
Back in control, no more shotty  
I bet a lot of me was lost  
"T"'s uncrossed and "I"'s undotted  
I fought it a lot and it seems a lot  
Like flesh is all I got  
Not any more, flesh out the door ?1  
I must'a forgot, you can't trust me  
I'm moment-to-moment and close but don't show it  
Before you know it I'm lost at sea  
And now that I write and think about it  
And the story unfolds  
You should take my life  
You should take my soul'

'Am I the only one I know  
Waging my wars behind my face and above my throat  
Shadows will scream that I'm alone  
I-I-I I've got a migraine  
And my pain will range from up, down, and sideways  
Thank God it's Friday cause Fridays will always be better than Sundays  
'Cause Sundays are my suicide days'

'She asked me, "Son, when I grow old,  
Will you buy me a house of gold?  
And when your father turns to stone,  
Will you take care of me" '

'I ponder of something great  
My lungs will fill and then deflate  
They fill with fire  
Exhale desire  
I know it's dire  
My time today  
I have these thoughts  
So often I ought  
To replace that slot  
With what I once bought  
'Cause somebody stole  
My car radio  
And now I just sit in silence'

'Night falls, with gravity  
The earth turns, from sanity  
Taking my only friend I know,  
He lives a lie, his name is Hope  
I'm never what I like  
I'm double-sided  
And I just can't hide  
I kinda like it  
When I make you cry  
'Cause I'm twisted up, I'm twisted up, inside'

'I do not know why I would go  
In front of you and hide my soul  
'Cause you're the only one who knows it,  
Yeah, you're the only one who knows it  
And I will hide behind my pride  
Don't know why I think I can lie  
'Cause there's a screen on my chest  
Yeah, there's a screen on my chest'

'I can't take them on my own, my own  
Pa, I'm not the one you know, you know  
I have killed a man and all I know  
Is I am on the run and go.  
Don't wanna call you in the nighttime  
Don't wanna give you all my pieces  
Don't wanna hand you all my trouble  
Don't wanna give you all my demons  
You'll have to watch me struggle  
From several rooms away  
But tonight I'll need you to stay.'

'I want to drive away  
In the night, headlights call my name  
I, I'll never be, be what you see inside  
You say I'm not alone, but I am petrified  
You say that you are close, is close the closest star?  
You just feel twice as far, you just feel twice as far'

'I know what you think in the morning  
When the sun shines on the ground  
And shows what you have done  
It shows where your mind has gone  
And you swearing to your parents  
That it will never happen again  
I know, I know oh ow, what that means, I know oh oh oh ow'

'I know  
Where you stand  
Silent  
In the trees  
And that's  
Where I am  
Silent  
In the trees  
Why won't you speak?  
Where I happen to be  
Silent  
In the trees  
Standing cowardly'

'Now the night is coming to an end  
The sun will rise and we will try again'

'There's an infestation in my mind's imagina-'

"F-Furlan?"

My nightmares, the voices, where are they going? Don't tell me, don't tell me I lived?

"Furlan... Y-you're awake!"

Annie, Reiner, Bertolt, Ymir, Isabel, Mikasa, Armin, Levi, Hange, and...

Eren.

EREN POV

It's been two weeks, Furlan has been in coma, for two weeks, his ankle was sprained but has healed, his cut in his abdomen has healed, his ribs are doing better, and his arm cast will come off in a week.

I hugged him and kiss him, I felt like I was going cry.

"Don't scare me and Izzy like that Furlan"

I back off, Furlan's four friends are here, the Ymir girl said she has go in a minute to pick up her 'girl'

I looked around and saw Levi, Furlan almost died because of that, because of me.

"Furlan, I'm sorry, I will get you or I will do whatever you want, what do you want me to do to make up for everything I've done?"

Furlan looks confused, emotionless, it's scaring me a little.

"I'll do anything for you Furlan", I repeat myself.

He looks at me with tears in his eyes, and what he says shocks everyone in the room, looking horrified, my heart dropped and shattered everywhere.

He said...

"Kill me."

As simple as that, this can't be Furlan, it can't be.

He starts crying which makes me sick in the stomach, what did you do Erwin, what did I do?

He's crying his heart out and all he does is repeat those same words over and over again.

"Kill me."


	11. And Carla... I'll be holding on to you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Furlan talks with a living angel.

FURLAN POV

'Fight it,  
Take the pain, ignite it,  
Tie a noose around your mind  
Loose enough to breathe fine and tie it  
To a tree. Tell it, "You belong to me.  
This ain't a noose, this is a leash.  
And I have news for you: you must obey me." '

"Furlan? You okay?"

Awaken from my mind, again.

I looked over and saw a woman, possibly in her late thirties, she had black hair and beautiful brown eyes, her hair was kept tied loosely to the side on her right shoulder with a dark red tie, she had a grey hoodie, dark blue jeans and black work boots.

I leaned forward towards her and whispered:

"Are you an angel?"

Yes! Finally! I probably died over night or something, but my hopes were lowered when I saw the woman giggle as her cheeks started blushing.

"No I'm afraid not"

Well shit, I'm still alive, but who is this woman, I mean she's really beautiful.

"Then who are you? Not to sound rude"

She looked at me and laughed, that fuckin' laugh was contagious.

"I'm Carla, Carla Yeager, Eren's mother"

Oh yeah, Eren, the reason why I almost died, the reason me and Isabel had to set back the recording dates, the reason why I'm fuckin' losing my mind.

But this woman, his mother, was making me sane.

"He asked me to check on you while he's at work, your friends said they'd come by later, you feelin' alright?"

"Yeah, I can move my ankle without clinging, I can breathe deeply without my ribs getting crushed or worrying about my stitches popping off, but my arm is slowly getting better"

"That's great, so Eren told me you're in a band"

"Yeah, me and my adopted sister are"

"What's your band name?"

"Twenty One Pilots"

"Where did you get that name from?"

"A play about a man deciding what's best for his family after causing the deaths of Twenty One Pilots during World War 2, the moral dilemma is what I liked about it, we had to study it for one of my classes"

"What instrument do you play?"

"Piano, Synthesizer, Guitar, Bass, Organ, & a Ukulele"

"You're very talented, what about your adopted sister?"

"Isabel plays the drums, programs a drum machine, other than that she just mixes the songs together, adding effects, lowering some tracks, turning some tracks up, that's what she does"

"What kind of genre do you guys play?"

"We're not sure, we've been called "Schizophrenic pop" or "Schizoid pop", we honestly don't know what the hell we are"

"Interesting"

"Yeah, it is"

We had a bunch of different conversations, she only came to make sure I'm alright but she's still here, talking about The Picture Of Dorian Grey, and other poems and poets.

She's really beautiful, friendly, despite the fact she looks almost like Eren she doesn't act completely like him, more friendly and not too hot headed.

But she's so beautiful... Her laugh... Her smile... Her hair.... Even her fuckin' eyes, why is she so beautiful.

So beautiful.

"Umm, Furlan?"

I opened my eyes, the sight makes my eyes widen even more, I was leaning forward and... I kissed her.

I leaned against the hospital bed, so nervous and embarrassed.

"Shit! I'm sorry Mrs. Yeager! I don't know what made me do that! It won't happen aga-"

Now she leaned forward and kissed me, she kissed me with passion and full of love, I gave up and kissed her back.

After a minute we separated to catch our breaths.

"I'm sorry, it's just... I haven't been kissed like that in ages, my husband is almost always gone and barely pays attention to me, then you just... And I... And here we are"

"It's okay, I just..."

Then we kissed again, after we broke apart, she wrapped her fingers with mine, what the hell am I getting myself into.

"I don't know if I should be doing this, you're married and you have a child, that I dated, I don't know if this wrong or... Right"

She squeezed my hand and kissed my cheek, then me... Again.

"No one needs to know"

"Are you sure about this Mrs. Yeager? It shouldn't seem right but..."

"But it does?"

"Yeah, it does"

"Let's just give it a shot, it's a secret, I shouldn't be cheating on my husband but you make me feel... Loved"

"If that's what you want, I'll give it a shot as well"

She smiled and we kissed... Again.

"Well I should head home, I'll come by tomorrow, same time"

"Okay, I'll see 'ya tomorrow Mrs. Yeager-"

"Call me Carla"

"Uh... Okay, I'll see 'ya tomorrow... Carla"

"I will too, Furlan"

Kissed again then she left, we both had smiles on our faces.

What the hell am I getting myself into.

It shouldn't feel right at all...

But it does.

'You are surrounding all my surroundings  
Sounding down the mountain range  
Of my left-side brain  
You are surrounding all my surroundings  
Twisting the kaleidoscope  
Behind both of my eyes'

'Ah ah ah  
Ah ah ah (and I'll be holding on to you)  
Ah ah ah  
Ah ah ah (and I'll be-'

"Holding on to you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler Warning: Furlan and Carla's relationship is gonna last a couple chapters, it's not the final relationship, but it's gonna last for awhile.


End file.
